The Prince's Cousins
by The Pudding Fiend
Summary: Have you ever wondered what goes on in the cousins' heads? The games don't give you much insight on these characters, so let's poke around in their heads a little and see what we can find.
1. Slip

I don't own Katamari Damacy. I am sad.

Yo, Pudding Fiend here. I've decided to start a new fic on the cousin's, who I know everyone loves. I'm only going to put one disclaimer here, so...yeah. Anyways, here's a chapter on Slip. I'm going to have to take a lot of creative license for this, since the descriptions given in the game don't really give you that much to go on.

Hello, my name is Slip. Nice to meet you.

I have a cousin named the Prince; he's quite famous, you know. I saw him on TV last night, as I was getting ready for bed. It was nice to see my second-cousin get the attention he deserves, he does such hard work. As for me, well...people don't notice me very much. Just last night, Nik sat on me when I was watching TV. He didn't hear me when I tried to get him off, but it didn't hurt, so it was okay. I really hope the King of All Cosmos doesn't sit on me, though. _That _would hurt.

This morning, I decided to go out and greet the fans. I know that they aren't my fans, but some are pretty nice, so I like to say hello. I bumped into Opeo on my way; I hope he wasn't hurt. Then again, I don't think I could've hurt him if I tried. I don't hit very hard; usually I get blown away before I can do any real damage. Actually, that _did _happen; right after I bumped into Odeo. I went flying for a while; the stars are really quite pretty; well, the stars that are there, anyways. Macho caught me before I went too far. Macho may look scary, but he's really quite nice. He helped me get back to the Meadow, where I found a fan in need of attention. I decided to help her; turns out her son's room needed cleaning.

I helped a few other people after that, then decided to take a lunch break. I had miso soup today, which was quite delicious. Can-Can and Daisy were arguing about something, quite fiercely too. So fierce that Can-Can's head set on fire. Thankfully, Daisy used her milk to get it out before Can-Can started to panic (Last time that happened, the entire meadow was on fire. It took quite a long time before it was set out). I went back to work after that; you wouldn't believe how demanding those fans are!

After a long day, I was ready to hit the sack. I got ready for bed again, although I had to get Beyond off of me before I could get to the washroom. I brushed my teeth and cleaned my face, then got into my futon. I hope Macho doesn't start snoring again, it's quite loud. Well, good night then.

So, how did you like it? Any requests on who I should do next? No cousins from Me & My Katamari or Beautiful Katamari (if there are any new cousins in that; I'm not sure.) please. Just cousin's from Katamari Damacy and We ♥ Katamari, because I don't own the other two.


	2. Miki

Thanks to the two people that reviewed! I'm going to do your requests in the order that I received them: Miki, Colombo, and Kuro.

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I'm Miki! This is the first time that I've been in the top three of anything, so...ha! In your face Odeko! You said I'd only ever be the sixth in everything, but I proved you wrong. To the readers, I'd like to thank you for requesting me for a chapter in this story.

(Oh no! Miki, you broke the fourth wall! We must repair it! Come, Prince! You must roll up...what _are _you supposed to roll up? Hmmm...We must think on this!)

What? Why is the King of All Cosmos here? Oh, well, he's weird, anyways.

(That isn't very nice, we can hear you perfectly fine from here, you know.)

Oh...sorry.

(That's alright, we are used to being misunderstood. On another note, we have decided on what the Prince should roll up! Prince, you must roll up as many stages as you can in 15 minutes! It's up to you to restore the fourth wall!)

...How is that supposed to help? Aren't I _supposed_ to talk to the readers?

The Select Meadow is pretty big, you know. It has to be, to fit all of the fans and us. I don't know why the King has so many fans; he never does anything. If anything, we cousins should get all of the credit, the Prince too. Walking through the Meadow without getting harassed by the fans is impossible, but I guess it wouldn't hurt to help them. They _did_ come all this way to see a katamari demonstration, after all. I'm going to help that teacher clear the school of kids, then! I'm going to beat the Prince's score, just watch.

(A few minutes later...)

I didn't beat the Prince's record. Heck, I didn't even beat Havana's record, who was fifth after the Prince. Oh well, I guess it's time for a break. I'll go and get some green tea from Nik. He always has something to eat or drink.

(Some more minutes later...)

Alright, time to help another fan! This time, I _will_ beat the Prince! I'll—

(Royal Rainbow!)

It's the King!

(We have returned! Rejoice, for the fourth wall has been restored!)

...Sorry, he's always like that.

((Gasp) Miki! You broke the fourth wall again! Quickly, Prince! To the theatre!)

Sigh...


	3. Colombo

Colombo here, reporting live from the zoo!

There are all sorts of amazing animals here, from your average lion to your atypical grade-schooler! Attractions abound; in fact, some animals are out of their cages and are visiting the tourists! Just remember kids, don't touch the monkeys, because they bite! Also, remember to get your rabies shots, because you never know when you'll need them!

Oh, look, it's the Prince! Working hard, as usual, I see. He's picking up animals at a roaring pace; he's on a roll! Ok, I'm sorry, couldn't resist. Anyways, it looks like his katamari is starting to attract some attention from the younger visitors. They're flying _everywhere_! Oops, looks like he missed one. There she goes; wow, can she run! Looks like the adults are finally starting to notice. They're starting to flee, although it appears as if some people are actually trying to attack the katamari! That isn't deterring the Prince, though; in fact, it looks like he's gaining momentum!

The adults are panicking, the children are screaming and the animals aren't faring any better! It's pandemonium, folks! The Prince is on a rampage! Oh no, he's coming my way! Swim faster, mister alligator! Aaaahhhh---

[WE ARE EXPERIENCING SOME TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. WE APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONVINIENCE, PLEASE STAND BY

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That's what it sounded like when the Prince first went through the zoo with his katamari. Absolute chaos. I hope you liked it! 


	4. Lucha, Honey and Dipp

Thank you for reviewing! I'm so happy! (bawls)

I'm really, really sorry this took so long. I'm such a lazy bum, don't kill me! (ducks)

In this, I'm going to do Lucha and Kuro together.

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This is the 6:00 news on KOACTV, with your hosts, Lucha! 

"Hola!" (Insert corny pose here).

And Kuro!

"...Why am I here again?"

"Welcome, my friends to the 6:00 news, where I, the magnificent Lucha (insert random corny pose here) will deliver the news of the universe with _style_!"

"Our top story tonight...the cousins are on strike. They have left Select Meadows on a strike until they're demands are fulfilled. We go to Honey, who is speaking with some of the cousins."

"..."

"Honey?"

(Appears on screen covered in K&K's (Delicious candy-covered chocolate ants! Crunchy! Owned by the King of All Cosmos Co. © Not for reproduction.) and random bits of paper)

"Oooo, I'm going to get that Ace, I will. Why did he have to switch his butt with such a big one? It's not like he needs one; the spikey model was bad enough! Holes all over the Meadow, making a great mess of things and I nearly twisted an ankle, so I did! Ooooooo..."

"Ummmm...Honey?"

"Hm? Oh! Is the camera on?"

"Yes, Honey, it is."

"Oh, omigosh! I'm sorry! Erm...what was I doing?"

"You were interviewing a cousin on the strike, Honey."

"Oh, right. And that's when Ace pushed me down...um...anyways, I have the cousin's demands right here, just let me find it..."

(Pulls the piece of paper off of a very unhygienic spot. I leave it to your imagination).

"Okay, their demands are...that The Prince no longer be the main character, that they appear in the credits of all of the games...and...root beer. That's all."

"Thank you, Honey! Now, to—wait, aren't _I_ a cousin? Doesn't that _I'm_ on strike?! Mi Dios, that cannot be! I never agreed to this! I cannot be on strike, I—"

"...Oi vey...let's just go to Dipp for the sports. Lucha, would you shut up? Not all of the cousins are on strike, just some of them! Calm down!"

(Switches over to Dipp, who is not in fact reporting on sports and is instead, hosting a wild dance party.)

"Yeah! Dance, Ace, dance! Spin that new butt!"

"Dipp! What are you doing?"

"Oh, hiya Lucha! What's up?"

"What's up? We are in the middle of a report! You are supposed to be reporting on sports!"

"Really? Why? It's so much more fun to party! You guys should come down and join the rest of us!"

"Dipp! We are on the job right now, this is no time for partying!"

"Aw, c'mon! I've even got a nice little secluded corner for Kuro, supplied with snacks and everything!"

"No, we cannot go—Kuro, what are you doing?!"

"Getting up, what's it look like?"

"You don't mean to go to the party, do you? We are still working!"

"Well, just because you don't do anything fun in _your _free time, Lucha—"

"What?! How can you say that? I do lots of fun things in my spare time! I am a fun person! You cannot deny this!"

"Whoa, Lucha, calm down! I didn't—"

"I do many fun things, like making churros!"

"Sure, I like your churros, but—"

"How can you know this? I have never given you a churro, you could not know that it tasted good! Unless...you have been spying on me!"

"What?"

"Yes, you have been spying on me! To see my private life, yes, and to spread the word to your other spy friends! Well, I won't stand for it! Justice shall prevail, justice shall prevail!"

(Kuro sighs and shakes his head wearily, as Lucha laughs maniacally in the background.)

I did all of KataMario's requests in one! Yay!

The review button is hungry! Feed it!


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